Xmas Reflections

So, another season of Christmas has just passed. I'm getting better at it. For those of you who don't remember, I was raised a Jehovah's Witness, and we never celebrated Christmas (or birthdays). So, Christmas season has always been like walking around in a foreign country to me. I don't know the words to songs, I'm not sure which decorations are appropriate (do people need frogs with Santa hats on them??), I sure as hell don't do church at that time, and present giving/receiving is difficult. The first year with El Hijo's family, I had presents all around me and up to my knees. I was overwhelmed, as stupid as that might sound, and I had a hard time enjoying myself. Last year I tried to escape from Christmas completely by running away to Acapulco. But the flights during Christmas were all gone, so I had to go the week before instead. When I got back, I still had to do Xmas, and it was miserable. I should've fled and begged for asylum at Meg's, actually, but for some reason at that time I thought she lived in Michigan. Anyhoo. I've made progress over four Christmases.

I've eased into it my way. Each year I added something new. I started out with these glass light up present boxes, which I thought were beautiful. So, I had those going, and it was my one Christmas decoration. That was also the year I began to figure out how the present thing worked and how to get my related family more than one thing without spending a fortune. Last year, I adopted the Charlie Brown Christmas music. I play it while I cook and wrap presents, and generally just drive everybody nuts. This year, I think I knocked the present thing out of the park. For one thing, I did a huge chunk of my shopping in the few days after Christmas, when a lot of things were on sale. I just horded them back. That worked out really, really well, and for the first time, it looked like we were reciprocating. I hate getting ten things when I only gave one, no matter how much the giver thinks its OK. This year I managed to generate about four things per person. And I paid cash. :) Well, I used the credit card, but I can pay it all off in one swoop. So, I rawked the gifts this year. I was even able to include people whom I normally cannot buy for, but it had been a better year for us even in spite of the recession.

Quickish story about gift giving. I had gone into Kentucky at Thanksgiving, and sure enough, it was as swampy and depressing as usual. To avoid having to see relatives I'm not close with, as Mom likes to line people up to go through the motions, I skeetered away and went to see the people back home that I'm actually close to. One of those people was my best friend from home, whom I love dearly, but we haven't spoken in a very long time. It's always been cool, and we can just pick up where we left off, but that's not how I want it to be. Anyway, she works in a daycare. My son goes there when he comes in for the summer. She has two kids, F & M, who are about eight and four now. When I went in, I hadn't seen the four year old since she was about a year and a half. Of course I didn't recognize her. I talked to my best friend for a while, and then I knelt down where M was "resting" on the mat and hugged her and talked with her quietly for a little bit. When I stood up, I asked about F. I dearly love F, even though I haven't spoken to her in the same amount of time. I have known and loved F since she was an infant. She feels like a daughter to me. I helped F read--got her these little books and sat at her kitchen table and helped her go through them when she was a kindergartener. I have secret plans to help F go through college and get the hell up out of KY. She's one of the reasons I dress up a bit when I go into KY. I want her to see what kind of life is possible outside of KY. Yes, I'm purposely constructing the context so it will seem glamorous to not be in KY. She doesn't have to know that my gorgeous leather and fur coat, for example, was an *awesome* find at the Salvation Army for $10--she and everybody else just think it looks like a million bucks. I'll tell her that secret when she's older. She was probably about 4 1/2 or 5 years old the last time I saw her. I didn't expect her to recognize me. My BF pointed her out across the room and called for her to stand up. When she did and looked my way, her eyes got really big and she said "OH!" And came running over. I figured she mistook me for somebody else. She gave me a really big hug, and I laughed and said, "You don't even remember who I am." "Yes I do!!" she said. "OK, then, who am I?" I teased her. "You're Virgil!" She whispered really loud and buried her head in my coat. Holy shit. That little girl and sister got Christmas presents this year. :D

As my one new thing to add, I made a wreath this year and put it on the door. Here's what it looked like:


D/B swung through and put a string of lights on my front balcony. It was simple, so it didn't freak me out. Next year's project I think might be a Christmas tree. Maybe. I've been giving it some thought, and I think in year five, I could potentially handle a tree. Then I got to thinking about what kind of tree, because since it's me, it can't be normal, necessarily. I think I want a tree with nothing but bird ornaments. A tree full of birds would be pretty to look at, especially since those round globe ornaments kind of freak me out for unknown reasons. So, who knows? Next year I might have a bird tree to report. I have a full year to get used to the idea.

We had Christmas day dinner with some friends and their little girl. I found out that I can both use the "good china" and make a mean spread. We had basalmic chicken (turkey seemed too stressful), garlic mashed potatoes, green bean casserole, broccoli casserole, spiced apples & squash, crab cake appetizers and I baked a red velvet cake. I made the chicken and the potatoes and the cake, they brought the crab cake and the green bean casserole, and El Hijo made the other sides. I had both wine and low test "sparkling" grape juice, because the other three are not as...high octane...as I am. It was a really good dinner. Martha Stewart should totally watch out.

Earlier that morning, we opened gifts. Here's a pic of the living room before:

And that doesn't include the stuff that you can't see in front of the entertainment center. If you look carefully, you can find the cat ass in the picture as well! I even had a few presents stuffed in the liquor cabinet (where one of the light up present boxes also is). Apparently people either love us or feel very obligated toward us. El Hijo and I bought each other about three things. That's typically what we do. The rest is from other people, mostly family. El Hijo's family is particularly generous, but they can afford to be, I guess. I got things I really wanted/needed. His parents got us a set of knives, which we really needed. I got pyjamas that I'm lounging in now. I got a few great books, including Girls from Ryadh & Jaguar Smile, which I'm super excited about. I love travel/journalism/social/political stuff. When a book combines all of that, I think it's made of win!

I'm leaving for San Francisco early tomorrow morning. I'll be back just before the New Year. San Fran is holding a national conference for all the English/Language academic types across America. It's bound to be full of material for hilarious posts!

-- DV